


Badge of Honour

by RavenShira



Category: Naruto
Genre: #FemslashWeek2018, F/F, Gen, Oblivious, One-Sided Attraction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-31
Updated: 2018-08-31
Packaged: 2019-07-05 00:06:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15852201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RavenShira/pseuds/RavenShira
Summary: Sakura fingered the little bouquet of flowers in her hand. Pink camellias forLonging, white carnations forSweetandLovely. Gardenias forSecret Love.She looked up and across the street, watching pale blond hair dance in the sunlight as its owner threw her head back in a laugh, linking armswith her new conquest. A brunette male that gazed upon Ino in a way Sakura wished she was allowed to.Her fingers found the one pink-striped carnation she hid between all the others, taking it out and letting it fall to the side of the road.Wish I Could Be With You





	Badge of Honour

Sakura rubbed at her eyes for the umpteenth time, the light of her small desk lamp too dim for the amount of reading she still had to do. She blinked rapidly, trying to will the dryness of her eyes away. There were still a few pages left of the medical report that she wanted to read through and it was just so fascinating. Despite how interesting she found it, the yawn that broke out of her told her that her body disagreed on that note. Not interesting enough to skip out on even more sleep apparently.

 

Stretching her arms above her head she leaned back in her small chair, a creaky little thing she'd had for ages but never really had the heart to throw out. She had it since she was a little girl; her first 'adult-sized' chair, that was well worn and just too comfortable to throw out simply because its padding was a bit frayed. Besides, there were memories in this chair that she was just too fond of to give up on. Her thumb found the armrest and the carving she and Ino had made with one of her very first kunai.

 

_Ino x Sakura BFF_

 

Her fingers trailed over the clumsy scratched words, edges worn soft by all the times she had let herself linger on days long past. When she and Ino were so close it was rare to see them apart at all. Her parents had even jokingly asked if they needed to buy a bigger house, or if a second bed would somehow fit in her room to hold the sibling Sakura had gained while they weren't looking.

 

Sakura had protested vehemently. Later, she had thought that this might be the first time she had hurt Ino deeply. But Sakura had never ever seen Ino as her sister. Not even back then. At that time Ino had been her best friend and the crush that slowly developed over time was only the blossoming of feelings she didn’t fully understand yet.

 

It had been shortly after that Ino had told her about her crush on Sasuke, and Sakura panicked at the thought of being left behind and had went along with it. Had yelled her “feelings” to the world, even though she had needed a second to think who exactly Sasuke even was. It wasn’t like she had talked much to him before, or even to this day. She had liked Sasuke well enough, but mostly he had been her ticket to making Ino notice her as more than some shy girl she had all but adopted. Rivalry was better. It made sure that Ino never left her behind, had to look at her and acknowledge her in the shadow of Ino’s own brilliance.

 

Not that that was entirely healthy or had helped her in the long run, but Sakura had been a bit desperate and a child. It had turned out well enough in the end.

 

A sharp rap on her window made her jerk in the chair. Her eyes found the clock and winced as she read the time, the big arm hovering close to the twelve while the small arm had wandered off towards the two without her noticing how much time had passed during her readings. Another rap made her jerk back to her window and she shoved the chair back to stalk over and pull the curtains to the side, intent on giving whoever thought it was a good idea to hover around her bedroom window at two in the morning a good tongue-lashing.

 

Once she drew back the curtains she faltered, blinking to confirm that it was indeed Ino hovering outside her bedroom, looking a bit ruffled and waving awkwardly at her from her perch in the tree that was just outside Sakura's window.

 

Without further prompting Sakura opened the window, grimacing at the loud scraping sound that was amplified in the silent night.

 

“Ino?” she whispered, leaning forward, heart beating a quick rhythm in her chest.

 

“What are you doing here, this late?” Sakura asked, but stepped aside when Ino made to jump.

 

A second later her platinum-blond friend slipped smoothly through her window, just like she had done back when they were kids, just with a lot more skill that made Sakura take a small step back and swallow hard. Ino never knew how she affected others around her. Or she knew too well, but... it seemed that Sakura was either hiding her attraction really well, or Ino just never considered her as a possible admirer. The catch-22 of her life, apparently.

 

Sakura was always taken aback by how beautiful Ino was. Long, slender, and impossibly smooth legs, covered in tasteful and form-fitting purple skirt that rode low on her hips like a tease. A flat, toned pale stomach, and the high-collared blouse that cut off just below her breasts just accentuated her shape, drawing attention to the skin. Her hair was just as much of a tease as the rest of her. She had grown it out again; now it reached all the way down her back, smooth and silky even though Sakura knew Ino wasn't doing much more than basic care. Her hair had always been naturally beautiful, the beauty products they had used as kids barely doing anything for her.

 

What Sakura loved most though were her eyes. A pale cornflower blue and so very expressive, if you knew her well enough. And Sakura knew her friend, and currently she looked nothing like her usual self.

 

Closing the window, Sakura turned around to see Ino fling herself on her bed, hands propped behind her as she leaned back and pouted up at Sakura's ceiling.

 

Sakura had to drag her eyes away from her legs again and raised an eyebrow.

 

“Ino?” she questioned as she made her way over to her creaky chair, settling down again and crossing her legs, hands curled in her lap. She was suddenly hyper-aware of how she was dressed. An old t-shirt that was too big for her (might have been from one of her teammates now that she thought about it), and baggy sweatpants that were washed out but soft and comfy. She hadn't exactly expected company.

 

Ino let out a sigh and suddenly dropped back to lay fully on Sakura's bed, hair spread out in tangles that Sakura wanted to comb through with her fingers, arms spread wide and still avoiding Sakura's gaze.

 

“Hey Sakura...” Ino said, voice thick as she finally chanced a glance in the direction of her best friend.

 

“Oh.” Sakura said, sympathy warring with the painful tug in her heart. So it was like that. Despite their differences it had never changed that she and Ino had been and always will be best friends. Once Ino got over Sasuke, she had opened up to the idea of dating and Sakura had watched her from afar, smiling and cradling her wounded heart as Ino conquered man after man.

 

Ino turned to the side, curling up in Sakura's bed like she owned it, and she fully faced Sakura. Vulnerability poured from her in waves that Sakura was helpless with the desire to fix until Ino was back to her strong self, proud and beautiful. This wasn’t an uncommon scene, Ino coming to her with her romantic woes. That didn’t make it hurt any less each time.

 

“I don't think I love him...” Ino sighed, misery clouding her eyes, disappointment tugging the corners of her mouth down.

 

Ah. Fuyumasa, if Sakura remembered right, was Ino's latest triumph. He was... nice enough, if a bit boring if Sakura was being kind. If she wasn't he was boring, lazy, untalented, arrogant and didn't appreciate Ino nearly enough.

 

But maybe that was just her being petty. And jealous. She pushed down the feelings that inner always seemed to wave in her face.

 

“Why not?” Sakura asked instead, ignoring her inner self,  who was happily pumping a fist in the air. She shouldn't feel pleased when Ino was heartbroken.

 

But... she couldn't help herself. It was mean and Sakura felt horrible because of it, but seeing Ino with her boyfriends hurt just as much, if not more.

 

“I don't know...” Ino sighed, wrapping a blond strand around her finger and avoiding Sakura's eyes.

 

“Maybe winter is just not my season.” Ino pouted and Sakura choked on a laugh. It was springtime, but Fuyumasa's name contained the character for winter. It was just the kind of word game Ino loved to play.

 

“Maybe not.” Sakura agreed carefully, as it didn't seem that Ino was too upset about breaking up with her boyfriend. There had been others Ino had been devastated over. Rarely, but Sakura didn't want to be the elephant in the florist shop and trample all over the delicate blossoms strewn about.

 

“We just didn't fit.” Ino mumbled, frowning at her hair as she repeatedly wrapped and unwrapped it around her finger.

 

“I don't know... I just can't seem to find the right one...” and that was the heart of the problem, Sakura mused silently, reaching up and tugging at her own hair. It was a habit she picked up recently, as her hair had grown a little longer, brushing over her shoulders when left to its own devices. Currently Sakura had it tied back in a loose pony-tail, but some had escaped and tickled her cheek.

 

“I'm sure there is someone perfect for you...” Sakura said, feeling her heart tremble, words she had held back for so long stuck in her throat, whispers of appreciation, adoration, hopes and fears.

 

She warred with herself, but as always the words wouldn't come, especially not now when Ino was just getting over her latest break-up.

 

Disappointment lay itself on Sakura like a well-worn scarf.

 

“Perfect, perfect, perfect.” Ino muttered unhappily, shoulders slumping. “I don't want someone perfect, I just want someone who understands me and... and...” Ino rarely floundered for words but this time it took her a few seconds to find some, “...just likes me for me, not my looks, or my connections or inheritance, or anything else. Just Ino.”

 

Just Ino. Sakura felt her cheeks warm, Ino was just... Ino. Her best friend, the one who had given her confidence, who had defended her, who had pushed her and helped her and grown with her. Just Ino was great and beautiful and a million other words that fluttered like butterflies in Sakura’s stomach.

 

“Mh.” she mumbled, hands clutching at her sweatpants to hide their trembling. If she just confessed right now... just opened her mouth and admitted to her feelings...!

 

“Anyways... he's a bit.. pushy.” Ino finally admitted, cutting Sakura's thoughts off and sitting up again, looking uncomfortably down at her lap. Her ruffled exterior suddenly wasn't just because it was in the middle of the night and Sakura nearly crushed her own shin when her hand grabbed a little too tight to her own leg in frustration.

 

“Can you help me with my latest mistake?” Ino begged, hands clasped in front of her and looking at her from beneath long blond eyelashes, making Sakura sigh and roll her eyes, despite the warmth that flooded her. Ino didn’t need help getting rid of the guy, but she still insisted on female moral support. Or Sakura support, as she had never asked anyone else.

 

It always led to movies and sleepovers and binges on food that they really shouldn’t be eating but was so delicious that they couldn’t not. The last one was new, but they were long over any silly notions of diets and keeping in shape. If anything, they now had the medical knowledge in addition to the brutal training that had made them reconsider their ridiculous stance originally.

 

If Tsunade ever found out they started another diet, Sakura shuddered to think what her teacher would do to them.

 

“What do you have in mind?” Sakura said, because she could never refuse to help Ino when she asked and for a few seconds allowed herself to bask in the radiant smile Ino sent her way as she launched into an elaborate plan to make Fuyumasa back off after Ino had already broken up with him.

 

This, Sakura thought a little bit vindictive, was the good part of Ino's break-ups. If anything, it was stress-reducing to send pushy little pricks running.

 

❀ ~ ⸎ ~ ❀ ~ ⸎ ~ ❀

 

Sakura fingered the little bouquet of flowers in her hand. Pink camellias for _Longing_ , white carnations for _Sweet_ and _Lovely_. Gardenias for _Secret Love_.

 

Flowers she'd picked by hand early in the morning, spending ages to find the correct ones that she had chosen from a book the evening before. It had been about a week since they had scared off Fuyumasa and Ino being a little bit mopy about being boyfriend-less and sulking whenever she saw one of their friends. Naruto and Hinata were especially sweet to watch sometimes. They were just so incredibly lovey-dovey that they seemed to be in their own little world and the reaction when Sakura or someone else pulled them back to the ground was hilarious. Hinata might have gotten past her shyness, but she was still easily flustered and Naruto had a protective streak that was a mile wide and longer, as well as a clueless innocence that just was so easy to rile. Still, they were cute and Ino had pouted at them for a full hour when they had spied the pair sitting in the new little cafe that Ino had selected for their binge-cake-eating time.

 

Sakura wondered at her decision, feeling incredibly nervous and jittery at the thought of giving Ino flowers. Ino loved flowers, she would understand the message immediately, and Sakura had made sure to cross-check every flower she had picked, only taking the ones she deemed the healthiest for her little declaration. Her palms were sweaty and she tried to discreetly wipe them on her red qipao. She had to talk herself out of abandoning her mission several times and had stalled here and there. But she had promised herself that this time she would tell Ino about her feelings. Maybe flowers were a roundabout way to go for it. But Ino, for all that she went on so many dates, had almost never gotten flowers from her admirers, as if her working in the flower-shop negated the gesture. True, Ino was picky about flowers, but that only presented a challenge that one could easily circumvent with a little creative imagination and effort.

 

Familiar laughter made her look up, heart suddenly racing, a smile already forming on her lips as her head turned around.

She looked up and across the street, watching pale blond hair dance in the sunlight as its owner threw her head back in a laugh, linking arms with her new conquest. A brunette male that gazed upon Ino in a way Sakura wished she was allowed to.

 

The smile froze, a familiar twinge twisting deeply into her heart as Sakura dropped her gaze to the flowers she had painstakingly cut off at the stems. She had been so careful not to crush them as she wrapped them with a single red bow similar to the one Ino had given her to tie her hair back, when they were children. It clashed a little with the flowers, but the memories had made her follow through with it anyways. Pink and red and white, they were all mixed together in this little heartfelt message.

 

Her fingers found the one pink-striped carnation she hid between all the others, taking it out and letting it fall to the side of the road.

 

_Wish I Could Be With You_

 

There was a lump in her throat and a burning sensation in her eyes, the colours of the flowers blurring together as if water was poured over a still unfinished painting.

 

“Sakura!”

 

Ino's delighted voice made her turn as if on autopilot, trying to lower her hunching shoulders and blink away the suspicious wetness in her eyes as she looked at Ino waving happily at her, dragging the unfamiliar man with her.

 

“Ino!” Sakura managed to sound surprised, even though her voice cracked suspiciously. She quickly cleared her throat, and Ino's eyes fell on the flowers, stilling for half a second before beaming up at Sakura.

 

“Who did you get these from?” She asked excitedly, dropping her boyfriend's arm and leaning in until she was nearly nose to nose with Sakura.

 

“Was it someone I know?” Ino's eyes sparkled, the idea of romance clearly still something that appealed to her. Sakura's gaze dropped down to the flowers again, feeling torn apart by the question that was equally just a convenient excuse to back out of the situation. But if she agreed, Ino would demand to know details and Sakura wasn't that good of an actor. Not enough to fool a Yamanaka at least.

 

“Uhn.” She shook her head “I picked them myself, they were just so pretty and I... have a few days off so I thought some flowers would look good in my room...” She forced a smile, clutching the flowers a little closer to herself as Ino leaned back in obvious disappointment.

 

“Aw...” Ino sighed, shaking her head slightly with a frown “I thought... ah, never mind.” she smiled apologetically at Sakura, then half turned to the young man standing at her side. “Look!” She snatched up the man's hand, her fingers interlacing with his. He was handsome, Sakura noted, but he was also checking her out with his eyes while Ino was introducing them and Sakura felt her smile turn cold as she nodded at him.

 

“Pleasure, I'm sure.” She said, ignoring Ino's questioning look at the sharp edge to her words. She felt bad to take her hurt out on her friend, and Sakura deflated to give Ino a wry, if weak, smile.

 

“Sorry, work was busy... you know how it is. I'm just a bit tired, is all.” She tugged one of the camellias out of her bouquet and gently put it behind Ino's ear, her fingers grazing her hair as she carefully put it in place, smiling at the baffled look she got.

 

“I'm happy for you.” she mumbled, a little embarrassed while squashing down the hurt. Ino being happy was more important after all, even if she had horrible taste in men. Sakura contemplated saying something, but... she didn't trust herself to do that. She always found faults in the men Ino dated, and she wasn't sure if her view of them was coloured by her own desire.

 

Camellia's also stood for _Good Luck_. And Ino could definitely use that.

 

Turning around and waving over her shoulder Sakura trudged along, taking the long route home. She had been heading in the opposite direction, away from her apartment as she had been on her way to Ino's place, but maybe a walk would settle the knots that were stuck in her stomach and would soothe the burn in her eyes.

 

It didn't help. If anything Sakura felt even more drained, tired and cold, despite the sun only just beginning to peek over the rooftops. When Sakura finally got home the flowers in her arms were drooping sadly. With practiced ease Sakura shrugged off her shoes, leaving them in a tangled heap on the ground and tip-toed her way into the kitchen. She put the flowers into a vase, her hands shaking as she tried to arrange them. Water dripped on the tabletop and Sakura gave it up as a hopeless cause, watching the blurry sight of the half crushed, half drooping flowers as put her hands flat on the table, leaning forward slightly, fingers scraping over the wood while trying to blink away the tears in her eyes.

 

“Idiot.” she croaked out berating herself, watching as more tears splattered down on the table.

 

“It's not fair.” She swallowed past the lump in her throat, rubbing the back of her hand against her tear-stained cheeks. If only she had gathered her courage a little bit sooner. Sniffling, she tried to will her tears away, it was silly and made her look ugly and she hated crying in general. But as always when her flood-gates opened, she just couldn't stop the tears, and for once she let herself be miserable in her unrequited feelings, let herself be bitter about not following through and telling Ino anyway. It hurt to keep these feelings hidden but at the same time she was so scared to admit to them. Ino had never looked at girls. She sniffled pathetically, and dropped heavily into a chair.

 

“Ungh,” she moaned, crossing her arms on the table and hiding her face in the crook of her elbow. Tears dribbled down the bare skin of her arm, her breath wet and warm as she tried to focus on medical information, anything really to take her mind off her heartbreak.

 

There was a knock on her door. Quiet and so hesitant that Sakura wasn't quite sure if she had imagined it. A second one, even more quiet, made her drag herself up and stare mulishly at the door. She should ignore it. Really, she should. She wasn't in the mood to face anyone and was quite possibly a mess.

 

A third knock, a bit more sure, made her sigh and stand up, the chair scraping over the floor.

 

“A moment!” she called out, making a quick trip to the kitchen-sink and splashing some water on her face, hoping her red eyes wouldn't be too obvious. Once she had dried her face on one of the kitchen-towels and ruffled a hand through her hair, she gave it up as a bad job. She listlessly trudged to the door, inwardly hoping that the person knocking would give up by the time she reached it. Opening the door a small crack and peering out, Sakura froze.

 

Cornflower blue eyes stared back in concern and Sakura nearly brained herself on the door in her haste to open it.

 

“Ino?!” she asked pretty much the last person she had expected to see on her doorstep. Ino shuffled in place, hands behind her back.

 

“Hey Sakura~” she said, peering cautiously at her friend as if gauging her reaction.

 

“What...” Sakura swallowed, feelings thrown into a chaotic mess that she hardly knew what to do with. “What are you... why are you... aren't you with- uh- what'shisname?”

 

Ino chuckled at her ramblings, rolled her eyes and gently pushed her way into Sakura's apartment. “Eh, he understands. You seemed down and I told him my best friend needed some pick-me-up.”

 

Sakura felt her shoulders drop, sighing. Just as she knew Ino, Ino knew her and it was hard to pull one over her. Ino was just so incredibly observant, except for the one thing Sakura really wished she would notice.

 

“It's fine, Ino.” Sakura mumbled, now feeling bad for having imposed on Ino's first date since her last break-up. Her jade eyes flitted to the side, hunching a little into herself as she tried to avoid looking at Ino.

 

“None of that.” The blond woman waved her off and Sakura slowly closed the door as it became apparent that Ino had no intention of leaving anytime soon.

 

“After all the times you listened to my whining, it's only fair I return the favour.” Ino gently put a hand on Sakura's shoulder, steering her back towards the kitchen. Meanwhile Sakura stared at the ceiling in despair; as if she was calling to a higher power for help to her get out of the situation she found herself stuck in. It was something she had probably picked up from Kakashi and a habit she really hoped she could get rid of before it became permanent – with little to no success so far.

 

“It's not really-” She stumbled over her words, floundered and dropped into a kitchen-chair when Ino practically forced her into it. She grimaced at the wet spot on the table that Ino tactfully ignored, and tried not to look at the mess of the flowers that Ino was currently watering, gently running her fingers over each stem, plucking off the crushed leaves and carefully evening them out in practiced motions that showed her years of experience in the flower-shop.

 

“Just talk.” Ino said, lowering the vase back onto the table. The flowers didn't look as much of a mess anymore and somehow, Sakura found that a bit of a relief. Ino put a kettle on the stove, water sloshing and the smell of Sakura's favourite herbal tea soon filled the kitchen.

 

Rubbing a hand over her still burning but thankfully mostly dry eyes, Sakura gave up. She might omit a few things, but why the hell should she not talk to Ino about this? If anything, maybe Ino had some insight into how to get these feelings under control.

 

“I... I love someone.” Sakura whispered as if it was her deepest, darkest secret. It was the first time she had admitted her feelings that she felt for Ino out loud, however vague she was while doing it. And it was freeing in a way.

 

“I've... I've been in love with them for a long... long time.” Sakura's voice shook, nerves making an appearance and her hands burying themselves in her qipao, wrinkling the material and smoothing it out in a nervous repetition.

 

A cup was placed right under her nose, pale, slender fingers gently swirling the ceramic temptingly, making the tea inside slosh like a miniature whirlpool. Sakura automatically wrapped her hands around her favourite mug, fingers brushing Ino's and leaving tingles in their wake.

 

She clutched it close to her chest, drawing her legs up on the chair until she was curled up, as if trying to swallow the little warmth the cup radiated. Just breathing in the scent was soothing.

Apple-blossoms and cinnamon. It was her winter-tea, but she wouldn't complain as she quite liked it all year round.

 

“Okay...” Ino said, pulling out a chair for herself and settling down across from Sakura, mirroring her position and carefully holding her own mug.

 

“I don't think they ever... really noticed me... liking them?” Sakura talked into her cup. It was easier to speak without watching Ino.

 

“I wanted to confess...” Sakura whispered, swallowing hard, “but they are kind of in a relationship right now, so...” she shrugged helplessly and took a long sip of her tea. It was silent for a moment, then Ino sighed, her chair scraping over the floor until she was sitting at Sakura's side. The pink-haired kunoichi startled as Ino's hand settled on her nape, carefully drawing her into Ino's side as pale arms surrounded her and Ino's head settled on top of Sakura's. Tears welled up again, the splinter in Sakura's heart twisting a little deeper as she closed her eyes, torn between enjoying the sensation and feeling despair at the illusion that wove itself around Sakura. Because like this she could imagine Ino reciprocating her feelings; could imagine this under happier conditions, cuddling on the couch and just.. enjoying each others company. She didn't let her thoughts turn to how she would lean into Ino's embrace, draw her closer and lift her head until their breaths mingled. Close enough to kiss, to let her fingers drift and explore.

 

Instead her fingers clutched tighter to her own dress, her body curling up on itself while Ino held her closer.

And though this kindness soothed her, it hurt just as much.

 

“They are an idiot for not seeing how wonderful you are.” Ino said with such conviction that it startled a wet laugh out of Sakura.

 

“Uhn,” she agreed, amused despite herself, and maybe the despair loosened its hold a little because even though she couldn't have her little illusion, she still had _**this**_.

 

❀ ~ ⸎ ~ ❀ ~ ⸎ ~ ❀

 

Things mostly went back to normal. Ino had invited Sakura along for more trips than usual, which Sakura shamelessly agreed to. But other than that their friendship was back on track. If her heart felt a little bit heavier than before, when she watched Ino with Masayo (she finally found out his name about four days after originally being introduced to him), well. That was her secret and one she knew how to deal with.

 

What she had not expected was the person that had apparently found a new pet project in her.

 

Sakura was wearily watching Anko dig into the dangos she'd been forced to buy.

 

Blackmail, Sakura thought darkly, that Anko wouldn't have if Sakura hadn't let her guard down and stared at a drenched Ino cursing the broken garden hose. Sakura had only intended to drop by for a short time. There might have been a little nosebleed and maybe Sakura had walked into Anko and had used her as a shield to hide from Ino as she tried to get her bearings. Manhandling the snake-summoner was probably one of her less intelligent decisions, but to be fair, she hadn't noticed it was Anko until it was too late! She had been busy staring at Ino and the water trailing down her body as the blond cursed and wiped the wet hair out of her face, but the strands were clinging to her and Ino had quickly disappeared inside the shop to change and dry off.

 

Okay, and maybe Sakura had felt a little weak in the knees, and looking up to find a viciously grinning Anko, with interest and malicious humour smirking down at her, had not helped her situation at all.

 

Now here she was – sulking – as Anko prodded at her secret crush, trying to get her to reveal _aaaaall_ the details while Sakura was forced to pay for her dango-obsession for her silence. It was a small price to pay, because despite Sakura's recent bout of insanity in wanting to confess she was scared shitless about the same. Now that the issue had been neatly pushed underneath the carpet again, she didn't feel ready for any confession, especially not one initiated by Anko. The woman was definietly mean enough to follow through with her threat, so buying dango it was.

 

Maybe it was cowardly, but the one thing Sakura couldn't begrudge Ino was her happiness. And despite Sakura's doubts about Masayo, Ino seemed happy enough. Whenever she saw them Ino was beaming with flushed cheeks and laughter. It was sad, but Sakura had only herself to blame for dallying. Besides, maybe it was better this way. If she only looked around herself and tried dating, just maybe she could find some small happiness and get over her crush. Then nothing needed to change between her and Ino then, and that was _fine_.

 

It _was_.

 

If she told herself often enough, maybe she would even believe it herself someday.

 

“Come on, princess. Don't be such a prude.” Anko bit off another piece of dango, letting out an obscene moan that made their table neighbours flush and discreetly look over. Sakura felt her face turn beet red. Shameless. Utterly shameless and Anko was enjoying this and her discomfort.

 

“There is nothing to say!” Sakura protested weakly, knowing that she was like an open book to the interrogation specialist. Her cheeks grew warmer with embarrassment. She honestly didn't want to talk about this.

 

Anko let out a put-upon sigh, letting the empty dango stick fall back onto the plate and leaning forward, her arms crossing on the table as she narrowed her eyes at Sakura.

 

“Fine.” Sakura mulishly stared ahead, her gaze fixed somewhere above Anko's right shoulder. She likely wouldn't get away without giving the interrogator something at least. That didn't mean she had to tell her everything.

 

“I have a crush on her.” Sakura pressed out, shifting in her seat and avoiding eye-contact “But she's in a relationship, so it's not like I can say something about it. Can we drop it now?”

 

Anko chuckled at her, leaned back and nodded.

  
“Get me another order of dango!” she called over her shoulder and Sakura groaned.

 

She didn't know how it happened, but when Anko stopped interrogating her, she was actually really fun to talk to and easier to connect with than Sakura ever thought. And she was vicious and blunt, something which Sakura appreciated. Somehow she got roped into meeting Kurenai with Anko, which led to a bar-hopping binge that Sakura had previously managed to avoid. It was fun. Anko and Kurenai flirted – as a joke or seriously Sakura couldn't really tell yet – and at the same time managed to keep anyone approaching them away. It was a fun evening out.

 

Right until Sakura got spectacularly dunk, blacked out somewhere between one bar and the next and woke up with the worst hangovers in history.

 

❀ ~ ⸎ ~ ❀ ~ ⸎ ~ ❀

 

Waking up in Anko's bed was something Sakura could have done without. Not because Anko was unattractive. Not even because they might have done something Sakura couldn't remember, even though her still half dressed state (probably) indicated they never really got that far. Not even because Kurenai was passed out on the floor, one hand on the bed as if she had either never managed to get in the bed or had rolled out of it without waking up in the middle of the night. No.

 

Because Anko was clingy.

 

She was wrapped around her in ways that bordered on contortion, just shy of strangling Sakura in her sleep. Maybe it was an unconscious reaction to the presence of a more or less stranger so close to her during a time she was vulnerable, but Sakura could have gone on with her life without the experiencing of being hungover and getting suffocated at the same time.

 

It took effort and more strength than Sakura wanted to concentrate on exerting in her current state, but finally she managed to wiggle out of Anko's hold, slowly stepping around the unconscious but still breathing Genjutsu-master, slinking into the bathroom. Silently she regretted every life-choice she had ever made that led her to this point in life. Her stomach roiled uncomfortably. A look in the mirror made Sakura grimace, yet she didn't really have the strength or will to do something about her messy state before she got around to at least washing out the stale taste in her mouth.

Circulating her chakra a little helped and the urge to heave settled slightly.

 

Tiredly she moved back to the bedroom, dodging Kurenai's limbs and wincing in sympathy at the uncomfortable position her fellow kunoichi was in. The apartment was small, so it didn't take her long to find the kitchen. A simple breakfast would make all of them feel better, even if her stomach protested at the mere thought of having to deal with substance right now.

 

Since she couldn't stand to even think of frying eggs and enduring the smell of burnt oil, she opted for plain rice with some simple side-dishes.

 

A bleary-eyed Anko stumbled into the kitchen just as Sakura was about to finish up.

 

“Oh god.” the snake-summoner moaned, slumping gracelessly into a chair “Move in with me. Make me breakfast every time, marry me.” Anko mumbled into her arms. One hand stretched towards Sakura, making feeble grabby motions. A second later Kurenai wobbled into the kitchen, a hand on the wall for support, the other pressed tightly to her head. She hesitated for only a moment before helping Sakura find some plates.

 

“You didn't need to...” Kurenai mumbled, rubbing her forehead with a frown as she squinted around the kitchen.

 

Breakfast was a quiet affair, but Sakura did feel a little better afterwards. It was comfortable and Sakura felt a lingering warmth when she looked at the two kunoichi. She had a feeling she had made some new friends last night, and a hangover was well worth that.

 

❀ ~ ⸎ ~ ❀ ~ ⸎ ~ ❀

  
Sakura was in equal parts sad and glad when she said goodbye to Anko. She was the first person she had talked to about her feelings and in a way it was relieving to actually tell a living person about it. Somehow it made it weigh less on her own mind. Anko hadn't pressured her into revealing more, rather she had shared a little bit of juicy gossip going around in T&I that wasn't too sensitive to share. Sakura was both intrigued and horrified. Mostly horrified at being intrigued. She had the slight suspicion that Anko was maybe feeling her out for her kind of work, but if she ever got asked Sakura would thankfully decline. She liked being a medic-nin. Torture was something she would be certainly be capable of with her intimate knowledge of anatomy and medicine, but she just liked helping people more than causing harm, and couldn't imagine herself on the darker side of the villages system.

 

Stretching her arms above her head Sakura rolled her shoulders and realised the tension from before had actually lessened a little. Not entirely, but it was better, and maybe the amount of dango she had to pay for was actually worth it. The amount of alcohol though...

 

If Anko actually kept silent time would tell. But despite being quite the gossip, Sakura didn't think the Tokubetsu Jonin would betray her trust, or that of anyone who wasn't on her bad side. And now that they were... sort of friends, she was almost sure it would be fine.

 

The hangover was getting better, and circulating her chakra helped to make the lingering after-effects ebb more quickly than they usually would. But Sakura was still glad to arrive at home, if for no other reason than being able to take a shower and slip into clean clothes.

 

❀ ~ ⸎ ~ ❀ ~ ⸎ ~ ❀

 

“Sa~ku~ra~” Arms wound themselves around her stomach as Ino tackle-hugged her from behind, startling the pink haired female out of her contemplations whether she should take fish home with her or stick to plain rice with vegetables. Sakura was running low on supplies after her recent mission and went to the markets. It was early, because Sakura liked to get her shopping done before the crowds made it near impossible to get to a stand in peace or take her time selecting her ingredients. Besides, being early just meant she got first pick on all the the best produce.

 

“Ino!” Sakura flushed and looked over her shoulder, somehow feeling as if she had been caught by her parents with her hand in the cookie jar. Ino squeezed her tighter in response, nuzzling her cheek with her own like a cat.

 

“What have you got so far?” Ino asked, putting her head on Sakura's shoulder and trying to peer into the shopping bag Sakura carried over her arm.

 

“Not much...” Sakura admitted wryly with a small sigh “Why? Do you need help?”

 

“Uhn! There is a festival coming up soon. I want to go shopping for something new to wear...” Slowly Ino released her and stepped up to walk beside Sakura “I could use a hand. Besides, I wanted to ask if you wanted to come with me?”

 

With Ino? Sakura felt her pulse start to pick up a little. But...

 

“What about Masayo?”  
  
“Ah, he's coming too! As are Shikamaru and Temari, Naruto and Hinata, Sai and a few others...”

 

Of course. Sakura repressed a disappointed sigh. She felt a little like the third wheel, but maybe she could go with Sai and watch the hilarity that was pretty much inevitable when he tried to navigate social events. She might even lend him a hand.

 

“Sure, Ino. Let me finish up here.” Maybe she could get a dress herself. She had grown out of her old one that she used for special occasions.

 

“Let me finish up here. I'll meet you around lunch-time? We can go shopping and then grab something to eat?”

 

“Sounds great. Come to the flower-shop when you're ready, there's this new place I want to try, it's close to that new merchant who sells beautiful festival clothes. I can't wait to try it out!”

 

With a laugh and her hair swishing behind her, Ino sauntered off. Sakura looked after her, then reluctantly and in a much better mood returned to her shopping. If she got it done quickly enough, she might get to spend more time with Ino after all.

 

❀ ~ ⸎ ~ ❀ ~ ⸎ ~ ❀

 

Shopping with Ino was an event in and of itself. Ino knew what she wanted, and the merchants words were ignored as Ino critically stared at herself in the mirror. It was a gorgeous, dark-purple kimono with a few pale yellow flowers near the hem and a lavender second layer underneath that brought out the richness of the first layer and made the flowers pop. A pale yellow obi accompanied the outfit. Sakura quite honestly thought it was was simply made for Ino to wear.

 

“It looks amazing,” Sakura whispered out, low enough that she had been sure nobody would hear but Ino peered up at her, a light flush on her cheeks.

 

“You think so?” she asked, raising her arms a little and twirling on the spot. “You don't think it's weird?”

 

“Not at all,” Sakura assured her, louder this time. Ino stared at her as if she wanted to make sure that Sakura wasn't lying to her, before beaming when all she found was honesty.

 

“Alright. This one it is then!” she cheerfully agreed, and went to change back into her usual clothes. When she came back there was a glint in her eyes that made Sakura take a small step backwards.

 

“Ino?”  
  
“Your turn!” The Yamanaka demanded, quickly clamping down on Sakura's wrist before she could make a run for it.

  
“Don't even think about it. I know you haven't gotten a new kimono and the last one I saw you in was a few inches too short and too tight around the chest! You need it, so we _will_ be getting you something.”

 

Ino stared at her, uncompromising and Sakura relented, if only because Ino was absolutely right and Sakura didn't want to embarrass Tsunade as her apprentice by showing up at important functions dressed in slacks.

 

“Fine.” She reluctantly agreed, feeling as if she had just signed her own death sentence.

 

It would be a long evening.

 

In the end it was Ino who found the beautiful red Hanfu that Sakura immediately fell in love with. It helped that Ino looked her up and down for a few moments in stunned silence, before insisting that Sakura _had_ to buy it.

 

❀ ~ ⸎ ~ ❀ ~ ⸎ ~ ❀  
  


To be fair, it was not like Sakura had planned to enter a bar anytime soon, after her latest escapade which ended in more pain than fun. It had been about two weeks now, but she was once more invited by her colleagues from the hospital and it would have been rude to decline again. Especially after she had promised to accompany them the first time she was asked and then proceeded to stall each and every single time she had been asked after that. She had run out of excuses now.

 

Sakura was determined to be more careful about her intake since the hangover and simply nipped at her glass every now and then. It was amusing, since her colleagues didn't have the same reservations and more than one was already going from tipsy to straight out drunk.

 

Which is why it came as a surprise to actually see another familiar face in the crowd, when Sakura herself rarely went to bars.

 

Masayo, with company.

 

And it was not Ino.

 

Frowning Sakura watched as he led the girl – also blond and clinging to his arm as she happily chatted with him – to one of the tables. They were sitting close – too close for mere friends. Sakura felt her grip around her glass tightening, glowering at the young man.

 

For a while she simply watched. Looked on as Masayo flirted and moved closer, slowly but charmingly seducing the girl at his side.

 

Had he broken up with Ino? Was Ino waiting for her? But why would he immediately afterwards go and search for a new fling? Ino had seemed so happy just the day before, Sakura couldn't imagine what could have possibly gone wrong in that time to make Ino break up with Masayo. Or had Masayo broken up with her?  
  
It gnawed at her, and despite trying to concentrate on the conversation around her she found that her gaze always strayed back to him. She felt unsettled as she watched him, and finally couldn't take it anymore when his hand landed on the girl's tigh. Standing up she excused herself from her group of coworkers.

 

“I'll be back in a second,” she told them, and then went to the bar to buy two drinks.

 

Slowly she meandered over to their table, setting a glass in front of Masayo and smiling at him. Anyone who knew her would easily see through the forced expression she had put on, but neither Masayo, nor the girl next to him were familiar enough with her to do the same.

 

“Such a coincidence meeting you here!” She exclaimed happily, sweetening her tone as Masayo looked up and almost flinched away from his companion.

 

“Sakura-san!” he stammered out, smiling at her awkwardly “I didn't see you around. How are you doing?”

 

Without waiting for permission – she didn't particularly care if it was rude – Sakura sat down across from them, leaning back in her chair as she pinned Ino's boyfriend with her eyes.

 

“Quite well, thank you. How about you? And who is the beautiful lady you are with?”

 

She could see the beads of sweat starting to gather on his bow, as he quickly looked at the girl.

 

“This is Hiroko,” he said “She works with me so we sometimes go out for drinks.”

 

To Sakura it sounded like a weak excuse.

 

“Out for drinks, hmm?” she asked, smiling joylessly “That's nice.”

 

Hiroko shifted uncomfortably at Masayo's side, but Sakura paid her no heed. It didn't really matter if she knew about Ino or not.

 

“I'm sure Ino would love to join us. I can go get her if you want, it's not _that_ far.”

 

For Sakura one thing was clear. Masayo did not want Ino to know about what he was up to in this bar.

 

“Let her sleep,” he hastily insisted with a shaky smile “She has to work early tomorrow.”

 

That excuse nearly made Sakura laugh in his face. Instead she simply stood up and looked at Hiroko.

  
“Would you excuse us for a second? We will be right back!” She said cheerfully as she grabbed onto Masayo's shirt and easily dragged him up to his feet with one hand, making him stumble after her. She waved her colleagues off, winked at the barkeeper, leered at the bouncer. Nobody questioned why she was dragging a stumbling man after her into an ally.

 

All joy wiped off her face as she pinned Masayo to the side of the building.

 

“I don't know what the fuck you think you are doing,” she quietly told him, her eyes spitting fire “But if you even think about cheating on Ino, let me make this perfectly clear to you.” She let off some of the pressure so that Masayo could breathe properly again. She didn't want to kill him after all.

 

“I'm a medic nin. You so much as make her cry, I know about fifty-four different ways to make sure you never have children. I know how to poison someone without it leading back to me. I know how to make a body disappear so it won't be found until we celebrate the coming of the 10th Hokage. I know where to stab you to cause most harm, leaving you unable to ever tell anyone as to who did it to you.”

 

Sakura smiled, drew her fist back and crumbled part of the wall next to Masayo's head as he stared at her, terrified and close to passing out.

 

“Let me rephrase that quickly, so your brain can keep up: You hurt Ino, I end you.”

She stepped back at that, ignoring his shaking body as he heavily leaned against the wall to keep himself up, trying to put as much distance between them as possible.

 

Sakura smiled. She knew it probably resembled a grimace, but from the way Masayo flinched further back, it did it's job. Unconcerned she dusted off her hands.

 

“Glad we understand each other.” She chuckled darkly, then left the alleyway, rage still bubbling deep in her. She didn't go home though, she went to a training ground to let loose some of the pent up energy and aggression that had accumulated while watching Masayo. She didn't want to go back on her word and end up hurting him before he gave her a reason, after all.

 

❀ ~ ⸎ ~ ❀ ~ ⸎ ~ ❀

 

Her fist still ached and her hand trailed over the sore knuckles, a small smile forming on her lips. She could have healed the bruises, but honestly she liked the little sting of pain, felt a vicious little snake of pride flare up when she ran her fingers over them. They were not very obvious, she had punched harder things than a wall after all.

 

“I don't understand,” Ino muttered. “He didn't even give a reason, he just up and left.” Ino scrowled into the direction Masayo had left in a hurry and Sakura felt her smile grow a little bit.

 

“Weird.” she commented mildly “Maybe he met your father?”

 

Ino snorted.

 

“That was a problem in the beginning,” she said breezily “We've agreed that he wouldn't interrogate them before the three month mark.” Ino put a hand on her hip, huffing out a breath and blowing her bangs to the side in the process.

 

“He lasted about a month. We were good...” She sounded a little lost and if Masayo had been a decent guy, Sakura might have felt guilty for stepping in and putting an end to the relationship herself. Maybe one day she would tell Ino the truth.

 

“I think you can do better.” Sakura firmly said, ignoring the slanted look Ino gave her, grinning at her best friend and bending down to pluck up a little daisy. For _Loyal Love_. She smiled as she held it out to Ino, who carefully took it from her, blinking at the tiny flower, so little and yet meaningful. It wasn't a bouquet. Maybe Ino would think she had just picked the first flower she saw. But Sakura enjoyed the light flush it brought to her cheeks as Ino chuckled, reached out and drew Sakura in a hug, strong and proud.

 

“You are the best friend in the whole world.” Ino said, putting her forehead on Sakura's shoulder even as her arms sneaked around her and hugged her close.

 

“And don't you forget it.” Sakura laughed, squeezing her best friend back.

 

It might not be perfect.

 

Maybe it would forever be one-sided.

 

But it was _**theirs**_ and if anything, Sakura was sure that she and Ino would figure out how to deal with any hurdles. Be it as rivals, friends or lovers.

 

Sakura's eyes looked past Ino and at the field, seeing the tiny forget-me-nots hidden in the grass, and held tighter.

 

Forget-me-nots. For _True Love_ and _Memories_.

 

“Let's go to the festival together...” Sakura whispered, and felt Ino nod in reply.

 

Love had many facets... And Sakura was honored to have Ino's.

 

**Author's Note:**

> A huuuge thank you my beta readers:  
> Lin of the [Genjutsu Support Group](https://discord.gg/cEE8Rj8) in Discord  
> [morallyambiguous](https://archiveofourown.org/users/morallyambiguous/pseuds/morallyambiguous)
> 
> I probably wouldn't have finished this in time without you guys!!!
> 
> Hope everyone enjoys this as it's my first time going into the area of femslash ^^


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